25 wks...Patience and Contentment Please!

Well, I have made it to 25 weeks today with Baby Girl M, and I physically feel great. The other part of me has been kind of..well.. emotional. Patience is a virtue that I currently do not possess, or is very limited to certain groups of people. I guess some groups of people have just been getting to me lately, and my patience for them is pretty much gone before the day even gets started. The two main groups I have had a problem with are the elderly and a few people at work. Everyone else can breath knowing that they are spared the wack of a stick from me... for now.

Some of the elderly have just been driving me plain bananas. I guess the whole "I won't change or make things easier for you and be difficult, because I can, and I am old" card has finally hit the fan. I cannot stand the way they stare, since they are just sitting around and watching everything go on outside, since nothing is on tv. My mom's neighbor is guilty of this. He sits in his front window with binoculars, and watches the neighbors. He finally got up and told my mom about a month ago, that it looked like she was going to be a grandma.... duhh! I guess watched like that really makes me uneasy. Yesterday, Allen and I were almost in an accident with an old lady who was about 75- 80 years old... talking on her cell phone.. yes, a cell phone, and driving, well...trying to drive at the same time. She could not make the turn onto the street we were turning off of without stopping completely and re-gripping the wheel before she took off again. Never once did she put her phone down. I really don't get it. Just because you have had your drivers license for 50+ years, does not mean you are a professional driver. There are lots of other things I see driving that these older people are doing/not doing.... running red lights, stop signs, not getting over and staying in the middle of the road, not paying any attention to the on coming traffic, and pulling out in front of a car, whipping a car around like they are trying to qualify for a Nascar race, and then driving like they are in a parade after whipping out onto the road.... uggh the list goes on and on. I know these things have been going on all along, but, for some reason, I am really seeing them more now. I guess after riding with someone like this, and observing it from another vehicle both really get me worried. I worry about when Hayleigh gets here, what if one of these people actually does hit us, and hurts us? Not, only me, but, what about someone else's kids? I just worry more about this every day it seems. I just do not want to be involved in an accident with someone that should not even be driving - or have even passed their driving test, and had actually hurt me, Allen, or Hayleigh. I am really afraid of what I would say to that person.

 I guess, the closer Hayleigh gets to being here, the more protective I seem to get of her. Some things I used to think I would be okay with, now, I am not quite sooo sure. Can some people really take care of her the way I would want her to? Will they actually pay attention to her? Strap her car seat in correctly, and drive safely with her? Will they respect my wishes, and hold themselves to the standard that I would hope they would meet with taking care of Hayleigh. I realize things will not be perfect, and I shouldn't stress out about these things, but, thinking about what could happen, really makes me want to just stay home and work from home. I know I would go stur crazy, but, sometimes, I really think I would not care. After all, we have waited a very long time to even get to where we are, I am just worried that something will happen, and we will lose everything we have longed to even have. I know that these feelings are mine and Allen's alone in this. I realize everyone close to us will love Hayleigh, but, they also did not have to go through everything we did just to get her here, and that makes her soo much more important to us than it would to someone else. Until you actually experience infertility, and deal with everything that comes along with it, it is very hard to understand.

The other set of people that bother me any more, are a few people that I work with, which I will not even get into the whole run down on that. I am home and not at work, so, I am okay. At least I can escape from work through the day, and not think about it. The older people thing is everywhere, and that is just something I cannot forget about as easily. 

Now, that I have vented all of that, I really do feel a little better, but, I know these things will either get worse, or not even change at all.

On a good note, I have finally figured out what a baby hiccuping in your belly feels like. This morning it finally dawned on me that what I had been feeling every once and a while, was Hayleigh hiccuping. I guess it is just one of those things I was second guessing this whole time. Kind of just like when you first feel your baby move, and wonder if you really did or not, was it gas, or was it my imagination? I have also been relieved about my sugar/ glucose reading. I had been taking it a few times last week - last night was my third trial at this. After a meal and waiting 2 hours, my reading came back 112. That is a whole lot better than it was a few days ago. Made me breath a sigh of relief. I had been worrying about developing gestational diabetes this whole time. Since I have PCOS, I am at a higher risk for developing gestational diabetes, and with all of the fruit I eat, it really makes me worry sometimes. I do not go in for the glucose test until week 28.... coming up really really soon now! So, hopefully, I can keep this all leveled out, and not have to worry later on about it.

On the ending with a good note, I gues it will end on Hayleigh's developments for 25 wks.

How your baby's growing


Head to heels, your baby now measures about 13 1/2 inches. Her weight — a pound and a half — isn't much more than an average rutabaga, but she's beginning to exchange her long, lean look for some baby fat. As she does, her wrinkled skin will begin to smooth out and she'll start to look more and more like a newborn. She's also growing more hair — and if you could see it, you'd now be able to discern its color and texture.