About Me

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Western North Dakota , United States
My husband, Allen, and I are high school sweet hearts. We started dating Sep.99'- I kind of followed Allen home one day, and never did leave, is Allen's story. November 02' we were engaged, and on November 22,2003 - we were married. Having been married for 6 years in 2009, marked the 5th year we had been trying to start our family. With the referral of a Fertility Specialist from a friend, our IUI attempts ended up being a complete success despite my doubts. We welcomed our sweet little girl, Hayleigh into the world on June 30,2010 at 6:28am after 37wks and 1 day of gestation. She weighed 7lbs 14oz and was 20 in long. We found out that we were Baby #2 on April Fool's Day- a complete surprise! Reid Allen was born 11/13/12 3:24am 9lbs 8.2oz 21", after 38wks 5 days. Our 3rd baby, Eva Jane, was born on April 19, 2015 after suffering a pregnancy loss June of 2014. We are currently anxiously awaiting baby #4 due 2 days before Eva's birthday, so we are having Irish Twins! Our family is so blessed and happy to be growing!

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

April Fool's (continued)

This is the part of all of this I wish I could just stop with. I never imagined that Thursday would go how it did, but, here it goes....

Thursday, I had made plans with my dad to go to eat lunch and tell him the news. Hayleigh's shirts were delivered at the house early that morning, while I was at work, and Hayleigh was at the sitter's. I ended up leaving work late after Hayleigh's pictures were in, and Jessica ran them right over to me at work before I left. So, I was on a mad dash to try to get home, get Hayleigh's shirt for lunch, and then pick her up. I didn't make it home- for some reason the power company decided to block the highway, and have a flag guy with 1 lane of traffic running- which was just the Southbound lane. After sitting there for 5min, I decided to try to turn around, and just go ahead and pick Hayleigh up and go ahead to lunch without the shirt. By the time I got turned around, traffic was backed up over a mile. I finally made it to Hayleigh- she was grouchy, and teething- come to find out... We were late, but made it to lunch with my dad at Bobe's Pizza. We ordered lunch, and made small talk. It was soo crowded in that place, that Hayleigh couldn't decide what to watch, or who to watch. Dad and I talked about our new home out in Colorado, and when we would be moving, then I told him we had more good news.. I told him about Baby #2, and he was ecstatic! He is hoping for a boy, just like everyone else- I just want a healthy baby. Anyway, lunch went well, and we decided to go home for both Hayleigh and I to catch a nap- we were both exhausted. 

After waking up, we got ready. I put Hayleigh's new shirt on her, and had butterflies in my stomach. Allen was on standby for when I told my mom, and then would later be on speaker when we told his Grandparents. Well, as far as telling my mom, lets just say it did not go well at all... I left wanting to cry, and hide in a hole. I just could not understand why she was soo upset, and mad that we were having another baby. Even her co-workers tried to talk her into being happy about it. I could not believe it, and this would not be the last of this unfortunately. 

I left Mom's work, and got gas, since my tank went to low fuel, and hurried out to Allen's grandparents- all while telling Allen about what had just happened, and my best friend the same story. We were all at a loss for words on why things went the way they did. 

I finally got out to Allen's Grandparent's house, had Hayleigh's jacket on, and Allen told them over the speaker phone, to take Hayleigh's jacket off, and look at her new shirt we got her. Allen's Grandpa picked Hayleigh up, and peaked - I forget what he said, but he was soo excited, he would not let Allen's Grandma see what was on the shirt. Finally I got Hayleigh sit down on a chair, and she got to read Hayleigh's shirt. "I have a Secret, I'm going to be  a Big Sister"......"WAIT! WHAT!!???" We had to then tell her, and tell them what was going on- about we had no clue, and this all happened on it's own. They were both really happy- jumping up and down. After what had happened just before, this made everything soo much better. 

I told them I was due the day before our wedding anniversary- November 21st, which is also the day before Thanksgiving this year as well. Looks like everyone will be coming to us for Thanksgiving. 
We talked over supper, and I told them how hard it was the whole week, not to tell them- and had to fib a bit about why I went to get blood work done at the clinic, and why I was sick. 

The rest of the weekend seems to all run together now- I finished one of my last remanding days at work on Friday, followed it up with eating supper with my mom, while waiting to get together with my cousin Tonya, and Hayleigh's Godfather, Garrett. The whole time I was with my mom, she did not want to talk about the new baby at all. She was just off. We made it back, and Tonya and Garrett arrived. We got on the topic of the new baby, we joked a little, and then I told Tonya about how this one was a COMPLETE surprise, and how I knew someone close to me who wanted a baby now, and I was wanting to wait. This sent my mom into a raging fit. She went on about that person being on public aide, and how all people on public aide need to be fixed. This really just burnt me. I then told my mom the one thing I did not want her to know. I told my mom, so since we had been on public aide for a few months, until Allen found a new job, should I have been fixed? There was a short pause, and she said YES. I cannot tell you just how embarrassed I was. She rented and raved about it all. I tried telling her that it was embarrassing to be on Public Aide, and that it is there if you need it, and we needed it. She told me that after her and my dad had my younger sister, we could have gotten on it, but she didn't - they just did without. I asked her how you were supposed to do without heat, power, food, and gas in the car? She just went on about it more- completely mortifying me. I finally told her to drop it and change the subject. I was bawling already on the inside. Tonya and Garrett then left after catching a few more pictures with Hayleigh opening her Easter from them, and playing with it all. My sister just happened to pull into the drive after they left, while I was putting our car seat back into my car. I was bawling. I could not believe my mom acted that way. What was wrong with her??? I felt soo alone - like I had no mother at all to share in my excitement with, and bond over. Why was this time different than the last? I finally made it back into the house, eyes puffy and red from crying. Magen then asks me if I was having problems again with my allergies. I was short with her, and told her No. She asked if I was okay, and I told her no, but I would be fine. I got Hayleigh rounded up as quick as I could, Mom trying to stall, just starring at me not saying a word, or even showing any remorse over what had just happened. 

I got Hayleigh out to the car, with Magen packing some stuff out with me, asking what had happened. I told her what had happened, and that Mom did not want me to have this baby, and was completely mad over the whole thing. Magen was sorry for me, and I was sorry for her staying with Mom, in the mood she was in. 

As soon as I left Mom's drive, I called her, and asked her what was the matter. We ended up having a long drawn out fight, with mainly me talking- she just told me that she didn't think that I needed to have that baby, she was not happy about it at all, Hayleigh needed to be the baby longer, and I can't even remember what else. I told her that I wanted Hayleigh to be the baby a little longer too, but Hayleigh and the new baby would be the same age difference as Magen and I were- 2 1/2 years apart. I asked her why she couldn't be happy for me- we were happy. Allen has a great job, we have a  new house to move to in a great area, we have great insurance, I was not 18 years old, Allen and I have a great marriage, we are very happy, and everyone was just happy. She wouldn't answer me, and told me she didn't want to argue with me anymore. I told her not to worry about us anymore- not to get me anything for Easter, or just anything anymore. If she couldn't be happy for us, to stay away until she could be, or at least put her differences aside. I bawled after that, and got a hold of Allen. He was worried I would get too upset, and put too much stress on me and the baby. I calmed down, and told him we were okay. I then called my friend up- late as it was, she talked to me. I re accounted what had just happened, and we had determined, it was not my hormones, that I was right to be upset. I finally fell asleep completely exhausted, and awoke the next morning with very puffy eyes. 

Since that night, not much has changed. We did get together with my sister and her boyfriend- just for them, since they had traveled 2 hours just to see Hayleigh, and even went to my mom's for Easter, which was very quiet. I sat at the opposite end of the table from my mom, with Hayleigh, Mom kept her distance, and Hayleigh hunted eggs. I got the rest of my garage sale stuff loaded up, along with Hayleigh's Easter stuff, and we went and visited Allen's Grandparents. We ended up having a good time with them and my sister and her boyfriend, but it just was not the same. After getting home late, we discovered my dad had been by and left a Easter surprise for Hayleigh- I ended up calling him kind of late, and briefly told him about how the weekend had went. He was baffled too. We made plans to eat supper this week for his Birthday, and left it at that. 

Since the weekend, I haven't heard anything out of my mom, and I don't know if we will before we move in a few weeks. I just wish everything would have went better. I don't want this baby to think that he or she was unwanted. Allen and I love each other very much, and are just tickled that this happened the way it did. Even though this all happened not at the time I would have wanted it to, it ended up being the perfect time. I will hopefully have 2 kids before I am 30- I turn 30 in February, and they will be closer in age- which is what I originally wanted. The other plus is that I can stay home with both Hayleigh and the new baby for at least the first year out there, and plan on going back to work after they get in school. It wasn't in my plans for this to happen- but I do believe God has a sense of humor- what better day to find out you are expecting, when you don't think it is even possible on your own, than on April Fool's ?? All in all, our family is happy and we cannot wait for  this Thursday, when I get to go in and hopefully get to hear and see the baby's heartbeat. So, I'll be back on here hopefully after my appointment on Thursday with some pictures, and possibly a video of a baby and one of the greatest sounds in the world- that baby's heartbeat. 


  1. I feel for you with all the family problems you are having--but just remember---take care of yourself and think of you (Hayleigh and Alan) for the next 7-8 months. Leave those family problems behind you. Sorry Mom could not have been happy for you but hopefully things will change for her and she will realize that things change when her daughter get married and start having families of their own---she cannot control you forever--you have to do what is best for you and YOUR own family.

    PS--I knew you would need those shirts soon hahah----CONGRATS to all of you

  2. Thanks Kathy! I know about the shirts too- that was one of the first things I thought after it all sunk in! I don't know why but I felt like I had to get them for later- just didn't know it would be not much later!