About Me

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Western North Dakota , United States
My husband, Allen, and I are high school sweet hearts. We started dating Sep.99'- I kind of followed Allen home one day, and never did leave, is Allen's story. November 02' we were engaged, and on November 22,2003 - we were married. Having been married for 6 years in 2009, marked the 5th year we had been trying to start our family. With the referral of a Fertility Specialist from a friend, our IUI attempts ended up being a complete success despite my doubts. We welcomed our sweet little girl, Hayleigh into the world on June 30,2010 at 6:28am after 37wks and 1 day of gestation. She weighed 7lbs 14oz and was 20 in long. We found out that we were Baby #2 on April Fool's Day- a complete surprise! Reid Allen was born 11/13/12 3:24am 9lbs 8.2oz 21", after 38wks 5 days. Our 3rd baby, Eva Jane, was born on April 19, 2015 after suffering a pregnancy loss June of 2014. We are currently anxiously awaiting baby #4 due 2 days before Eva's birthday, so we are having Irish Twins! Our family is so blessed and happy to be growing!

Monday, September 23, 2013

Being a SAHM and Oilfield Wife

I've had a lot of things on my mind lately, and I just get a lot of time to myself to think about it all- especially like right now... It's 11:30 pm, the kids are both in bed, and Allen is back up at work tonight.

I'm sure some of you would love to know what I do all day. "She has plenty of time to just lounge around", "Must be nice to afford to stay home", the list goes on and on of what I have heard, or what I hear about what society thinks the stay at home mom does.

Yes, being a stay at home mom is really nice, and having the house to myself 2 wks at a time without having to fix a big supper every night since my husband is away at work. BUT, I still to this day miss working- my time with adults. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE getting to spend all of my time watching our kids grow, hitting milestones, etc, but sometimes, especially days that I don't go outside of the house- like today- it was raining all day.. those days make for hard LONG days. The kids get crabby and stir crazy from not being able to go outside, we play hungry hippos, hide and seek, watch some movies with popcorn, etc, and I try to clean. I realize that getting to stay at home with the kids is a really great thing, and I really enjoy it, but some days just get really, really lonely.. It only happens to me when Allen is away at work, and I am here in the house by myself with the kids. When Allen's here, we are out and about 24/7, and I have the company of another adult. When Allen is gone, it is 2 whole long weeks just me and the company of a 10 month old that loves to scream, and a 3 year old little girl who is now obsessed with flying like Peter Pan. So, at the end of the day, I don't have someone to walk in and help me clear my head, to unwind with, or just to have the company of another adult. My schedule runs around the kids, not that of my spouse that is getting off of work, so it is the job that keeps going on and on, that never ends for me.

The topic has come up about me going back to work if it's so hard, or to do something that I can occupy my time with and bring in an income. The truth is I would LOVE to be a nurse, but our schedule won't allow it. I could put in the time in school, and get a job nursing here, BUT with Allen gone at night and for 2 wks at a time, there is no one here to be with the kids- go to their things they will be involved in with school and outside of school. I would most likely start out on nights, weekends, and holidays... I'm not taking that time away from the 2 most important little people in my life. Even if I waited for them to start school, I'm still not going to do that to them... miss ball games, school events.. I can't do that to them. My mom pursued her career into being a paramedic when I was in 6th grade. While it was fulfilling to her, and still is, I cannot tell you how many time me and my sister sat there and cried when she would have to leave to take call, or a transfer, or just go in. She missed many games, track meets, holidays, etc... We felt like we came after her job. I don't want that for my family, so even though it is something I would LOVE to do, I LOVE my family more than that dream.

The other job I would be really happy with that would fit around our schedule, and I can use the perks at home would be to become a photographer. That is what I'm gravitating towards more now. I love taking pictures of the kids- to me you can't have enough pictures, and those pictures should not come from you going broke paying for them. In our area, there is no one that does pictures under $100 with a cd. Their prints are sky high- they are charging at least 20 times what the print actually costs, with a hefty sitting fee along with those prints. I want to do a great job, meet new people, and not get rich off of it, but not go broke over it all either. We have been shopping for a camera, and I believe I know which one we will be getting me. I've been pinning on Pinterest like a nut, and reading all that I can about what I need to learn and know as a photographer with a DSLR camera, since I obviously won't be taking pictures from my cell phone. So, I guess my dream next to being a nurse on the maternity ward would be to be there helping capture those precious moments for someone else if I can't be there to help them though it on the medical side. I know there will have to be a little adjusting to enable me to be able to do that, but I'm sure I can find a way, and not have it take me away from my family.

So, for now we do crafts, work on our ABCs and counting, and just having fun playing around outside on walks or in the backyard. When Allen does get home, we spend all the time we can together, even if we are out running around almost every day. We have our date nights now, that are a complete breath of fresh air to us- and me especially. Not having to feed and care for the kids 24/7...getting a 3-4 hour break and being able to eat my own food without having to share, or feed, or take someone to the potty are great! Those little things make me a much better mom, and wife, especially since our time is limited with Allen's schedule. They allow me to get some time to unwind, and think more clearly on what we want for our family.

Anyway.... lots for our future coming and with me keeping the kids and the family my top priority. There are many things I'm nervous about right now, and things that are in the air that I know will come down soon. For now, I'm working my hardest on being the best mom I can- because that is why after all I am here with our kids every day- to give them the best upraising I can while Allen is not here with me. I know everything will work it's way out. All that I can do is to make a little time for myself, get some adult conversations in via phone, or in the check out line at Walmart, or catching up on hollywood gossip in a People magazine.

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